Instrument Jokes
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# Title Hits Rating 1 A Choristers' Guide To Keeping Conductors In Line
- |The basic training of every singer should, of course, include myriad types of practical and theoret... Read the whole joke12 0 2 Accordion jokes
- |An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist?A: An accordion play... Read the whole joke11 0 3 Any last requests?
- |A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and t... Read the whole joke11 0 4 Arriving at Heaven
- |A soprano died and went to Heaven. St. Peter stopped her at the gate asking, "Well, how many false ... Read the whole joke10 0 5 Arriving in Heaven
- |Arriving in HeavenThree men die and go to heaven and queue to meet St. Peter.St. Peter: Hi, what's ... Read the whole joke7 0 6 Bach in a Minuet
- |A note left for a pianist from his wifeGone Chopin, (have Liszt), Bach in a Minuet... Read the whole joke13 0 7 Bagpipe jokes
- |Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play?A: To get away from the noise.Q: What's the only thing wors... Read the whole joke12 0 8 Banjo jokes
- |Q: How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb?A: Only one, but all the others gathe... Read the whole joke11 0 9 Bass jokes
- |Q: Why did the bass player get mad at the timpanist?A: He turned a peg and wouldn't tell the bass p... Read the whole joke12 0 10 Bassoon jokes
- |Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?A: To get away from the bassoon recital.Q: Why is a bassoon b... Read the whole joke14 0 11 Cello jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin?A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.Q... Read the whole joke12 0 12 Clarinet jokes
- |Q: What's the definition of a nerd?A: Someone who has his or her own alto clarinet.Q: Why do clarin... Read the whole joke9 0 13 Contacting a friend
- |Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what lif... Read the whole joke12 0 14 Drum joke Q & A
- |Q: Why do drummers have a half ounce more brains than horses?A: So they don't disgrace themselves a... Read the whole joke12 0 15 Efficiency
- |From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management ConsultantsTo: Chairman, The London Symphony OrchestraR... Read the whole joke11 0 16 English horn jokes
- |Q: What is the difference between hearing an English horn solo and being tortured?A: One is far mor... Read the whole joke11 0 17 Fight between the musicians
- |At a concert hall one night, the stage manager comes across an oboe player and a viola player havin... Read the whole joke12 0 18 Flute jokes
- |Q: What's the definition of a minor second?A: Two flutes playing a unison.Flute players spend half ... Read the whole joke18 0 19 French horn jokes
- |Q: What do you get when you cross a French horn player with a goal post?A: A goal post that can't m... Read the whole joke12 0 20 George Bernard Shaw
- |While at a concert being performed by a very bad orchestra, George Bernard Shaw was asked what he'd... Read the whole joke7 0 21 Glossary of music terms
- |Accent: An unusual manner of pronunciation, e.g. "Y'all sang that real good!"Accidentals: Wrong not... Read the whole joke12 0 22 Guitar jokes
- |Q: How do you make him stop playing?A: Put notes on it!Q: What did the guitar say to the guitarist?... Read the whole joke12 0 23 Harmonica jokes
- |Steve Wright: I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, a... Read the whole joke7 0 24 Harp jokes
- |A harp is a nude piano.A Celtic harpist spends half her time tuning her harp, and the other half pl... Read the whole joke12 0 25 Harpsichord jokes
- |The late Sir Thomas Beecham used to say the sound of the harpsichord is like "two skeletons making ... Read the whole joke13 0
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